Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Affirmation vs. Compliments

Affirmation vs. Compliments
Maybe you did not know there was a difference.
I didn't think about it until I started reading "Practicing Affirmation" by Sam Crabtree.

This book brought to light how useless being nice can be. 
It's nice to say - You are pretty, cute, snazzy, have nice hair or some other surface claim that has nothing to do with a person's character.
That might give the person a little rush for the moment, it will not get them thinking about deeper character issues. Compliments will not stick or they can become an addiction which needs the next hit. 

I was guilty of tossing out compliments everywhere.

God centered affirmations are ones that point out the traits of God in a person. 

God made us in His own image.
Genesis 1:27
That means even the most hardened soul still has some traits of God in them. 

Crabtree points out that by looking for these and pointing them out, you can:
a) lift up that person's spirit
b.) encourage more of that character trait in them
c.) open the door for the gospel
d.) change how you see people around you to a more loving and godly light
e.) be praising God all day long since He gets credit for all these affirmations

So it sounds good but how?
How do you finds traits of God in us everyday people?

Learn the traits of God and look for them.
For example God is:
Gentle, loving, merciful, a good father, a loving teacher, a deep thinker, the inventor of organization, diligent in His work, etc... 
The Bible is full of examples, which means being in the Bible daily gives you a better chance of spotting these things. 

Then when you see one of these traits you simply say something like:
"God really made you a loving teacher".

That's it, that simple. Not something to be afraid of or worried about just something to make a priority. 

The book has so much more to offer than I can discuss here and I highly recommend it.