Tolerance

I recently heard a speaker talking about the difference in tolerating someone and loving them. It made a big impression on me.

I don't know about you but I would much rather be loved rather than tolerated.
Yet, I realized I often tolerate people rather than loving them.

I suspect God would not have commanded us to love people if the loving depended on something outside of us. If their behavior, hygiene, religion, intelligence, charisma or temperament were key, His command would have been to be lovable not to love.

I came up with some signs that you are tolerating a person rather than loving them.
I have to ask myself:

• Am I suppressing my underlying dislike of this person to interact with them socially?- that's tolerance not love
• Do I feel an internal cringe instead of a grin when they walk into the room?- that's tolerance not love
• Is it almost impossible to find a positive comment to make about this person or to formulate a prayer for them?- that's tolerance not love
• Do I have unexpressed doubts they can ever experience the love of God? that's tolerance not love.

and finally

• Do I treat them with kindness out of guilt or duty? that's tolerance not love.

Here's what I know about me:
I don't have the capacity to transform Tolerance into Love.
I don't even desire to transform it most of the time. It just seems like too much work.

Here's what I know about God:
He has the capacity to transform Tolerance into blindingly beautiful Love.
He desires deeply to do that and He only needs an open door into a heart to do all the work.

I have been thinking about this for 2 weeks and I have a feeling I will be thinking about it for years to come.