Ugh.
I did it again.
I let fear take the wheel.
It's no secret that our church has been going through some hard times. I have struggled with allowing those circumstances control my contentment.
I had the whole "Jesus + a healthy church = everything" attitude going.
The truth is Jeus + nothing= everything for a Christian.
Philippians 4:11 Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. 12 I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. 13 I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
This is what Paul is saying "nothing that happens around me can take away my joy and contentment if it is based on Jesus and what He has done for me".
All fine and dandy until you have to actually live it out.
When punch after punch comes to something you deeply care about. Just when it looks like something good may be coming, another deep cut comes.
And while the emotional blood is flowing and the fear is rising above your head, leaving you gasping for air, can you embrace the "+ nothing"?
Not easily.
For me when that spike of fear hit, I panicked. I spoke words of exasperation. I spoke words that sounded like blame. So and so is doing such and such and it's freaking me out.
The only thing that was "freaking me out" was my own lack of faith.
I was really saying "oh, Jesus you are great and all, but I need people to get on board with what you have asked me to do".
I need human helpers and human approval. Need, need, needy, need it.
What can be done for me, that Jesus hasn't already done?!!!!!?
Think about that one for a minute.
Think about it.
What has Jesus left undone, incomplete for me?
What emotional discomfort is too much for what Jesus has already completed in me?
Wake up call.
God was telling me "What Jesus are you talking about because, My Jesus, has done all the work that can ever and will ever be done on your behalf, so what need do you have that He has not already met (past, present and future all at the same time)?".
God was saying to me "Wake up to the truth".
How could Esther say "I will do as God is leading me and if I perish, I perish?
Or Daniel and his Jewish brothers say the same?
But we say, surely God would never ask me to stay in a circumstance that hurts or does not meet my needs. Sure He would never leave me in such deep pain.
No, He would not leave us in an emotionally empty place, a lie would.
Oh Yes, He can ask us to stay. Mainly He can ask it because a circumstance was never intended to meet your needs, only He was.
The older I get the more I realize Jesus is not nearly as concerned about my circumstances as He is my attitude and response toward them. Frankly, He can change my circumstances faster than the blink of an eye. But I am in control of my attitude and my response. He will use my circumstances to point out how my faith needs to grow if my attitude and response is one of gratitude and praise. Have an "attitude of gratitude" is how the late Christian humorist Grady Nutt put it. So, "how am I doing under the circumstances?" Just gereat, thank you, because I know Jesus is using my circumstances as an opportunity for me to give complete thanksgiving to Him "in all things."
ReplyDelete